I have been married for three years and my husband cannot fulfil his obligations towards me. He puts his family first and cannot stand up to them so they constantly backbite about me, verbally abuse me and interfere in our marriage. He still has not provided separate accommodation when there is a 27 year old brother in law at home where I have no privacy and there have been times when we have been alone as my husband does not see it as his problem. My husband does not financially provide for me as I am working and cannot make decisions about our marriage without asking his family. When I raised these issues, he has refused to speak to me and it has been 4 weeks now since we haven’t spoken and two weeks since I left my inlaws house. I feel he fears his family more than Allah and so I would like to file for Khula. Please advise.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Sister in Islam,
Life is full of trials and tribulations. That is the essence of life. In such testing times, we should remember the following verse of the Quran:
{يَاأَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اسْتَعِينُوا بِالصَّبْرِ وَالصَّلَاةِ إِنَّ اللَّهَ مَعَ الصَّابِرِينَ} [البقرة: 153]
Translation: Oh you who have Imaan! Seek help (from Allah) by means of sabr and salaah. Verily Allaah is with those who exercise sabr.
We suggest that you discuss your issue with a senior family member or local Imam who may have influence over your husband and his family and who would be able to advise him to correct his ways.
However, if your husband does not change despite your constant efforts then you should discuss your options with the seniors of your family and also make Istikhara before making any decision.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Ridhwaan
Student Darul Iftaa
UK
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai