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Breaking Swearing

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by ShariahBoard.org

Assalamualaikum,

My wife and I had a fight and in anger I told her, “Allah ki Qasam, I will not touch you again and not sleep with you”, and now I touch her so what can I do now. I broke my promise now what can I do to touch her again. Can I do charity for my sin. I didn’t mean to say that. I said it unintentionally to control the situation. And  is there any dua to read because we fight a lot on little things please help me. 

Jazakallah

 الجواب وباللہ التوفیق

In شریعت (Sharia’t) this kind of situation is called ایلاء (Ailaa). It has different scenarios and different orders apply accordingly. The issue regarding the swearing you made is that it is necessary to make رجوع (Rujoo’) with your wife and if you have the capability to have intercourse then you must have the intercourse with her within 4 months. If you will have the intercourse with her within 4 months then the swearing would break and the wife would remain in your Nikah and you will have to pay کفارہ (Kaffaarah) for breaking the swearing. If 4 months pass without having the intercourse then one طلاق بائن (Talaq e Bain) will be effected on the woman. If the couple want to live together after that then they would have to perform another Nikah within or after the عدت (‘Iddat) and then it would be necessary to have intercourse to keep the Nikah. If you do not have intercourse after the Nikah then 2nd Talaq would be effected after 4 months. Similar is the ruling about the third divorce.

It should be clear that whenever you would have the intercourse it would be compulsory for you to pay the کفارہ (Kaffaarah) for breaking the swearing. The کفارہ (Kaffaarah) for breaking the swearing is to feed 10 poor people morning and evening or to give each of the 10 poor persons صدقہ فطر (Sadaqa tul Fitr) 1 kg and 575 g wheat or its price, or one pair of clothes to each poor person. If one does not have capacity for either of the above then he or she must fast for continuous three days.

والايلاء على ثَلَاثَة اوجه ۔احدها مؤبد ۔وَالثَّانِي مَجْهُول ۔وَالثَّالِث موقت ۔الايلاء المؤبد فَأَما المؤبد فَهُوَ ان يَقُول لامْرَأَته ۔وَالله لَا اقربك ابدا اَوْ نَحوه فَأن قربهَا قبل مُضِيّ اربعة أشهر فقد حنث وَعَلِيهِ الْكَفَّارَة ان كَانَت يَمِينه بِاللَّه وان كَانَت بِشَيْء آخر فقد وَقع ذَلِك عتقا اَوْ طَلَاقا اَوْ غَيرهمَا وان لم يقربهَا بَانَتْ مِنْهُ بتطليقه ثمَّ لَو تزَوجهَا بعد ذَلِك وقربها حنث فِي يَمِينه وان لم يقربهَا حَتَّى مَضَت أَرْبَعَة اشهر بَانَتْ مِنْهُ بِالثَّانِيَةِ ثمَّ لَو تزَوجهَا بالثالثة وقربها حنث فِي يَمِينه وان لم يقربهَا حَتَّى مَضَت اربعة أشهر بَانَتْ مِنْهُ بالثالثة وَلَا تحل لَهُ حَتَّى تنْكح زوجا غَيره وَيدخل به ۔واما الايلاء الْمَجْهُول فَهُوَ ان يَقُول وَالله لَا أقْربك وَلم يُقَيِّدهُ بالابد فَحكمه حكم الابد سَوَاء بِسَوَاء كَمَا ذكرنَا(النتف فی الفتاویٰ : 1/369، 370)

كفارة اليمين عتق رقبة يجزي فيها ما يجزي في الظهار وإن شاء كسا عشرة مساكين كل واحد ثوبا فما زاد وأدناه ما يجوز فيه الصلاة وإن شاء أطعم عشرة مساكين كالإطعام في كفارة الظهار ” والأصل فيه قوله تعالى: {فَكَفَّارَتُهُ إِطْعَامُ عَشَرَةِ مَسَاكِينَ} [المائدة: 89] الآية وكلمة أو للتخيير فكان الواجب أحد الأشياء الثلاثة قال: ” فإن لم يقدر على أحد الأشياء الثلاثة صام ثلاثة أيام متتابعات(الہدایۃ:2/319)

واللہ اعلم بالصواب

This answer was collected from Shariahboard.org. It was established under the supervision of the eminent faqih of our era, Hazrat Shah Mufti Mohammed Navalur Rahman damat barakatuhum.

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