Q: About 7 months ago (the first week of Ramadhan) my wife requsted a divorce, she requested her brother to collect her and asked me to issue a talaq. I refused saying that it was not what I wanted. I requested that I will only abide if she gave me the request in writing, with the reason why she wants the divorce. Until this day I have not received it.
She moved in with her mother, who stays in the same town. Over the next few months I begged her to come back home and each time she refused. I kept on providing for her and he kids and sent her gifts etc., not once did she do the same. She even told me to arrange my own domestic worker to clean our house as she cannot manage to see to the house anymore. After numerous requests for her to please return home as we are still married, she refused.
About 2 months ago, I stopped giving her an allowance as I felt its not fair since she doesn’t want to come home. I still provide for the kids what they need. She says its unislamic as I have to still maintain her and her expenses. I have asked her to come home and fulfil her responsibilities which she refuses.
Please advise if I should conitnue giving her money and also, what should I do as she keeps on telling the kids and everyone else that I do not provide for her. I have left the car I bought for her with her and also pay for her fuel, and have not used a cent of her money in our marriage. I pay the kids school fees and give them an allowance as well. I feel since she has chosen to move out and stay with her mother, then her mother should see to her expenses.
And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)