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Shall I Attend the Wedding of My Wife’s Sister Who Is Marrying a Non Muslim

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by DarulIftaBirmingham

Answered by: Alimah Zakiratul Hoque

Question:

There are a lot of emotions involved and my wife is requesting that our family attend the wedding of her sister who is marrying a non-Muslim. She was told numerous times that what she is doing is impermissible in the eyes of Allah and will not be accepted but she still is going forth with it. Islamically speaking, what should I do here? Should we attend the wedding because our intentions are sincere or not? What is the direction I should take Islamically?

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

Answer:

Firstly, as you stated, it is impermissible for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim man.

Allah (SWA) says in the Qur’an:

“…and do not marry your women to polytheistic men until they believe, for a believing slave-man is better than a free polytheist, even though he may look pleasant to you. They invite ˹you˺ to the Fire while Allah invites ˹you˺ to Paradise and forgiveness by His grace. He makes His revelations clear to the people so perhaps they will be mindful.”

The Prophet has encouraged us to accept invitations. It has been narrated from Ibn Umar (RA) that the Messenger of Allah has said: “If anyone of you is invited to a wedding banquet, he must go for it (accept the invitation).”

If an invitation is such that it will involve things which have been prohibited by Allah and His messenger , then the invitation should not be answered (the function should not be attended), to prevent showing agreement with the disobedience of Allah. If the invitee is such that he can remove the disobedience, then he should attend (Fath Al-Bari, Vol 9, Pg 158).

However, failing to attend may result in breaking the ties of kinship. Allah has said in the Qur’an: “But those who break the covenant of Allāh after contracting it and sever that which Allāh has ordered to be joined [ties of kinship] and spread corruption on earth – for them is the curse, and they will have the worst home” (Qur’an 13:25).

As your actions would not change your sister-in-law’s decision, if she would sever ties due to your non-attendance, you should attend to avoid Allah’s curse on you or her, as this is the lesser of 2 evils (Qawaaid Fiqhiyyah, Pg 32).

In summary, you should first avoid attending the wedding and explain your reasoning. If refusing to attend will result in breaking the ties of kinship, then you should attend for a short while, avoid engaging in any other Haram activities and return home as soon as possible.

وَلَا تَنكِحُوا۟ ٱلْمُشْرِكَـٰتِ حَتَّىٰ يُؤْمِنَّ وَلَأَمَةٌ مُّؤْمِنَةٌ خَيْرٌ مِّن مُّشْرِكَةٍ وَلَوْ أَعْجَبَتْكُمْ وَلَا تُنكِحُوا۟ ٱلْمُشْرِكِينَ حَتَّىٰ يُؤْمِنُوا۟ وَلَعَبْدٌ مُّؤْمِنٌ خَيْرٌ مِّن مُّشْرِكٍ وَلَوْ أَعْجَبَكُمْ أُو۟لَـٰٓئِكَ يَدْعُونَ إِلَى ٱلنَّارِوَٱللَّهُ يَدْعُوٓا۟ إِلَى ٱلْجَنَّةِ وَٱلْمَغْفِرَةِ بِإِذْنِهِۦ وَيُبَيِّنُ ءَايَـٰتِهِۦ لِلنَّاسِ لَعَلَّهُمْ يَتَذَكَّرُونَ

عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عُمَرَ رضى الله عنهما أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ قَالَ إِذَا دُعِيَ أَحَدُكُمْ إِلَى الْوَلِيمَةِ فَلْيَأْتِهَا ‏‏

قال ابن بطال فيه : أنه لا يجوز الدخول في الدعوة يكون فيها منكر مما نهي الله رسوله عنه لما في ذلك من إظهار الرضا به نقل مذاهب القدماء في ذلك حاصله إن كان هناك محرم قدر علي إزالته فأزاله بلا بأس إن لم يودر فليرجع

فإن كان المدعو ممن إذا حضر رفع لأحله فليحضر إن لم يكن كذلك قال صاحب الهداية من الحنفية : لا بأس أن يقعد يأكل إذا لم يكن يقتدي به فإن كان لم يقدر علي منعهم فليخرج لما فيه من شين الدين فتح باب المعصية حكي عن أبي حنيفة أنه قعد هو محمول علي أنه وقع له ذلك قبل أن يصير مقتدي به قال : هذا كله بعد الحضور، فإن علم قبله لم تلزمه الإجابة

وَٱلَّذِينَ يَنقُضُونَ عَهْدَ ٱللَّهِ مِن بَعْدِ مِيثَـٰقِهِ وَيَقْطَعُونَ مَآ أَمَرَ ٱللَّهُ بِهِ أَن يُوصَلَ وَيُفْسِدُونَ فِى ٱلْأَرْضِ أُو۟لَـٰٓئِكَ لَهُمُ ٱللَّعْنَةُ وَلَهُمْ سُوٓءُ ٱلدَّارِ

يختار أهون الشرين

Only Allah knows best.

Written by Alimah Zakiratul Hoque

Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah

Darul Ifta Birmingham

This answer was collected from DarulIftaBirmingham.co.uk, which is run under the supervision of Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah from the United Kingdom.

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