I want to ask that I cover my head as order in Islam…. However, my husband forces me to uncover my head so that I can open my hairs in front of strangers…. What should I do…? From the last 2.5 years of my marriage, I am covering knowing that he hates it … Just want to know what Islam says…. Am I doing right by ignoring his wish?
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Sister in Islam,
According to Shariah, a woman has to conceal her entire self, including her hair from non-family men (mahrams). This is an express order of Allah.
Allah Ta’āla says in the Holy Quran:
يَا أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ قُلْ لِأَزْوَاجِكَ وَبَنَاتِكَ وَنِسَاءِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ يُدْنِينَ عَلَيْهِنَّ مِنْ جَلَابِيبِهِنَّ
“O Prophet! Tell thy wives and thy daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks close round them (when they go abroad).” (AL-Ahzab: 59)
Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam advised:
«لاَ طَاعَةَ فِي مَعْصِيَةٍ، إِنَّمَا الطَّاعَةُ فِي المَعْرُوفِ»
“There is no obedience if it involves sin; rather obedience is with regard to that which is good and proper.” Narrated by al-Bukhari, 7257. Muslim, 1840
Accordingly, you are correct in your approach. You are doing what Allah want you to do. You refuse to submit to the order of your husband against Allah as per the advise of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam.
We do not know the reason why your husband want you to expose your hair, you know better. It may be an inferiority complex of practicing on Islam. There may be no or few women covering like you. Probably he feels uncomfortable as a husband. In that instance, you need to advise him to be a proud Muslim and feel proud on practicing Islam. Instil in him the confidence to be a proud Muslim and practicing Muslim.
If the reason is that he wants to be proud of your looks and beauty and show off with it, tell him that you belong exclusively to him and not to anyone else. You don’t wish to be a model for everyone. Make him feel he is special to you and you wish to be solely for him.
The above are two possible reasons and the way you could get around him. Do explore other reasons and diagnose the issue and act accordingly.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Asim Patel.
Student Darul Iftaa
Venda, South Africa
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
www.daruliftaa.net