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If a boy and girl want to marry, but the boy is not 100 percent sexually fit and he told this to the girl. The girl knowing this still wants to marry him. Is it Permissible

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If a boy and girl want to marry, but the boy is not 100 percent sexually fit and he told this to the girl. The girl accepts this and says that she will bear it and knowing this still wants to marry him. Is it Permissible

Answer

Jazakallah for writing on behalf of your friends.

It would appear that your friends are planning their future without the advice of their parents, elders or proper medical advice. I wish to point out that it is unacceptable for non-mahram girls and boys to discuss such intimate details with each other. As long as they are not married, both of them have an obligation to each other to protect each other’s modesty and they have to obey Allah Ta’ala’s commandments about intermingling between the sexes. This is not a trivial matter and they should take heed urgently

I strongly suggest that this young man should speak to his elders and tell them about his sexual inadequacy. He should also seek the advice of a medical expert. It may be that his condition is treatable or reversable but by delaying to get expert couselling the delay may go become irreversible.

The young lady has to consider many aspects before she agrees to marrying him. “Love’ before marriage is not tangible and for real. Once a woman is married, she becomes ‘broody’ and her desire for children increases. If she is unable to conceive children due to a problem in the man, she may resent him and fail to derive emotional comfort from the marriage. She should give serious thought to this situation and seek counselling before she finally makes up her mind. I urge caution and much thought on both sides before a final decision is made on both sides.

And Allah Ta’ala knows best.

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CHECKED & APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai

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