Asalamualikum,
Please can you help and let me know if my Nikkah is valid.
I was telling my wife a joke with the following words: “I know how to make you disappear”, “your divorced”. It was a joke I read, and I was using the joke on her. I can’t remember if I said “I know how to make you disappear” or “do you know how to make a wife disappear”.
1st divorce I gave was 2 years ago. I can remember the conversation but my wife dose. She says that we was both very angry and were saying hurtful things to each other and that’s when I said “I divorce you”. I can’t remember how angry or upset I was. We both regretted it and reconciled.
2nd divorce was when I was calm and I knew what I was saying.
3rd divorce was over text. I was extremely angry and was being accused. I have a tendency to get extremely angry when I am being blamed for something I didn’t do. I was sending angry and aggressive texts. I was typing fast and not taking the time to think or read what I was saying. Everything was written out of anger and I sent a text saying “I divorce you”. As soon as I realised what I sent, I automatically regretted what I sent was very upset I said that and wanted to reconcile straight away.
Please can you advise if my Nikkah is still valid?
JazakAllah
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
Talaaq via text is considered a divorce[i] whether it was given in the state of happiness or anger.[ii] The three divorces are valid and considered Talaaq-e-mughallazah (permanently irrevocable divorce).[iii] Your wife is haraam upon you.
If you wish to re-marry your ex-wife, she will first be required to marry another person, consummate the marriage, then after getting divorced and spending her iddat she will have the option to marry you.[iv]
You should make tauba and istighfaar to Allah and seek guidance from a spiritual guide for reformation and specifically for anger management.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Aboobakr Siddeeq bin Mufti Amjad Mohammad
Student Darul Iftaa
Azaadville, JHB, South Africa
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim
[i] فتاویٰ دارالعلوم زکریا – (53 / 4)
ایس ایم ایس کے ذریعہ دی ہوئی دونوں طلاقیں واقع ہوگئیں
حاشية رد المختار على الدر المختار – (3 / 246)
وإن كانت مرسومة يقع الطلاق نوى أو لم ينو
فتاویٰ عباد الرحمن – (536 / 4)
میسج کے ذریعے بھی طلاق واقع ہوتی ہے
[ii] رد المحتار – ط. بابي الحلبي (3/ 244)
ويقع طلاق من غضب
[iii] الاختيار لتعليل المختار – (3 / 139)
( وطلاق الحرة ثلاث ، والأمة ثنتان ، ولا اعتبار بالرجل في عدد الطلاق )
[iv] بدائع الصنائع في ترتيب الشرائع (3/ 187)
وأما الطلقات الثلاث فحكمها الأصلي هو زوال الملك، وزوال حل المحلية أيضا حتى لا يجوز له نكاحها قبل التزوج بزوج آخر؛ لقوله – عز وجل – {فإن طلقها فلا تحل له من بعد حتى تنكح زوجا غيره} [البقرة: 230] ، وسواء طلقها ثلاثا متفرقا أو جملة واحدة؛
فتاویٰ دارلعلوم کراچی (443 /3)
تو اسکی بیوی پر تین طلاقیں مغلظہ واقع ہوگئیں، اب حلالہ کے بغیر آپس میں دوبارہ نکاح بھی نہیں ہوسکتا