How can I persuade my family to accept the guy I want to marry?

Respected Sister,

The best solution for this matter is for you and your family members to perform istikhaarah (seeking guidance from Allah). Try to persuade your family members to perform solatul istikhaarah and then discuss what was gained from it together as a family unit. You too should perform this prayer so then insha Allah, Allah will guide you towards what is best for you whether to marry the candidate or not.

Many a times we as the child fail to see the wisdom or reason why our parents forbid us or discourage us from a certain action. Take for instance a young child who climbs playfully on a bookshelf. The parents scold the child and tell the child to cease his actions but the child is still stubborn and persistent. Suddenly, the child falls down and hurts his leg. He cries for his parents and when his parents pcik him up to console him, say, “See, we told you not to be climb the shelf. Now look what happened?”

So similarly in our daily life. We might think that they are being stubborn or unreasonable but it is inappropriate for us to harbor those type of feelings towards them. After all, they are our parents and they have come into this world earlier than us. Hence, more experience with dealings of people.

Therefore, it would be advisable for you and your family members to perform istikhaarah in this matter so then everyone’s feelings will be taken into consideration insha Allah. Have trust and hope in Allah in whatever decision Alalh shows you and your family even if it is against the one you hoped for.

To view the method of performing the prayer, click on this link: http://www.classicalislamgroup.com/viewpage.php?page=573

And Allah knows best.

Wassalam.

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Binti Zahari