Method of getting over haraam love

Answered according to Hanafi Fiqh by

Q: I’ve landed my self in a real big problem in which I feel like I have no escape.

I turned to the local imam of my masjid for help regarding problems in my marriage. Over the space of 2/3 years we would talk regularly near enough daily. To the point we started falling in love with each other. Eventually he confessed how he felt and I also said how I felt and after this we met up once when we kissed however we realised it couldn’t be and we broke off. But he went and lied to my husband and everyone that I had to tried to come on to him I told my husband the truth and he believed me and stuck by me. But for the past one year I have been struggling to get over and forget him. And I feel like I’m messing my whole life up over this one person but I feel like I can’t see sense. I can’t approach my shaykh as the imam involved is also bayt with my shaykh and he told him his side of the story and I also said mine he advised me to change my number etc which I have done but I feel like my heart is so corrupt. I try to forget him but I can’t. I feel like I don’t love my husband but only sticking by him because of our children. I feel so lost and broken and I feel like I’m destroying myself and humbly request your guidance


A: When thoughts of the other person come to mind, think of the moment of death and after death; how a person’s body decomposes and rots and then becomes the fodder for the worms of the grave.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

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