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Trouble finding suitable spouse

I am a practicing Muslim mashallah and I am nearing to an age where I would like to think about getting married and finding a suitable life partner. However the usual routes are very difficult for me, I cannot marry within my family due to long standing feuds. Additionally my parents cannot help me either due to various issues which I wish not to share. I also cannot contact the local imams as the majority of them prefer to follow and believe the cultural aspects of Islam rather than what Allah has declared for us, and they do not run a matrimonial service to help Muslims. Consequently in order to find a decent Imaan I would have to travel miles out of my locality which is difficult.   

Finally I do not wish to create an internet profile on so called Muslim dating sites as I do not think it is safe for a young Muslim woman, and I cannot ask people through word of mouth as me and my family’s social circle is small and I work with a majority of khafir. So what can I do in my situation? I would like to adhere to Islam’s guidance as I want to please Allah, however I would also like to meet my potential spouse before agreeing as it is a big decision.

Please answer my question as this is the third time I am asking as you have not answered my question, and it has been 6 months.


In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

At the outset, we apologise for the inconvenience of not responding to you earlier. We attend to queries based on a quota system. We make dua Allah grant you a suitable marriage partner. Aameen.

Sister, we are living in the world of means. If a person has a rare sickness and doctors and medicines are not easily available, the person will have to search for the specialist doctor and medicine to have herself cured. The excuse of the rarity of the sickness and scarcity of the doctor and medicine may not be acceptable.

We understand your rare situation where your parents, family, friends or imams cannot assist you. However, you state you have a limited social circle. You may consider expanding the social circle with the intention of searching for a suitable spouse. Doing so is adopting means which Allah has made available to you. Once you identify a suitable spouse, you may meet to only see him.

We advise you to be positive, read salaat al-haajah and make dua to Allah. Allah has the power over everything and can provide solutions to every problem for those who fear him. Turn to Allah with patience and dua.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Muhammad Haris Siddiqui

Student Darul Iftaa
Melbourne, Australia 

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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