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Abusive son in law

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Assalamo alaikum

                       My daughter married about 6 years ago. the son law we got is very rude with us. he wants that whatever he dictates that should be accepted as correct teaching of islam. for example my daughter was doing niqab as parda but after marriage he forced her to remove this niqab. he abbuse me on face. usiing words like liers,hypocrites vulgar. although i am doing complete parda using niqab. there are so many things to write about his rude behaviour. he is doing all right infron of my daughter. dont yu think that islam gives her right to save guard her parents against his rude attitude. canyu tell up to what extent she can go to stop him abusing me and my husband.


In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

We take note of the contents of your email.

If what you have stated about your son in law reflects the reality of the situation, then his rude behaviour is un-Islamic and unfortunate.

As parents, your focus should be the happiness of your daughter and the success of her marriage. That will require you to be tolerant and rise above the emotions of the abuse. It may be extremely challenging upon your daughter to address such an issue with her husband as he may feel she is choosing her parents over him.

You may consider confining your relationship with your son in law to basic  courtesy. If need be, discuss his attitude with an appropriate person who is mature and influential to advise him.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Huzaifah Deedat

Student Darul Iftaa
Lusaka, Zambia 

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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