Answered by Ustadha Shazia Ahmad
I am fully aware that only men get Hur al-‘Ayn (maidens of Paradise) and a woman gets only one husband. I read that the Hur al-‘Ayn are right now in Paradise and are awaiting their husbands and get sad whenever their husband gets upset or hurt.
Is there any creation, anyone at all, in Paradise that is also eagerly awaiting women and gets upset when they are hurt? If not, why is there only creation awaiting men, and no one awaiting women? I am not referring to women only having one husband, I refer to someone in Paradise awaiting them and getting sad when she is sad.
Thank you for your question. As far as I know, no one in Paradise is saddened by a woman being hurt, nor someone waiting for them in Paradise. However, this should not make you feel inferior.
The hadith that you refer to is this: Mu‘adh reported the Prophet, (Allah bless him and give him peace) as saying that no woman annoys her husband in this world without his wife among the large-eyed maidens saying, “You must not annoy him. God curse you! He is only a passing guest with you and is about to leave you to come to us.” [Tirmidhi]
Allah Most High as told us in the Quran, “Indeed, Allah defends those who believe. Surely Allah does not like whoever is deceitful, ungrateful.” [Quran, 22:38]
And Allah told us, “Allah is the Guardian of the believers—He brings them out of darkness and into the light. As for the disbelievers, their guardians are false gods who lead them out of light and into darkness. It is they who will be the residents of the Fire. They will be there forever.” [Quran, 2:257]
And Allah Most High said in His book, “Is not the curse of Allah upon the oppressors?” [Quran, 11:18]
Allah Is Our Sufficiency
Allah, in His infinite wisdom, has made Himself the protector, guardian, and defender of the believers. And that is all we need. Would you rather have some creation in Paradise who feels bad for you or awaits you when you have your Lord is ready to avenge what has been done to you? Our Lord is our sufficiency.
Make this dhikr (remembrance) when you have these thoughts:
“Our Lord is our sufficiency and He is the best disposer of affairs.”
حَسْبُنَا اللهُ وَنِعْمَ الْوَكِيل
Please see these links for more details:
What Do Women Get in Paradise?
Explaining Misunderstood Hadith About Women
Why Are Only Wives Threatened in Hadith for Making Mistakes?
In your previous answer, you mention that Allah will take revenge for women, but Allah also does the same for men. I just do not see why men in addition to that also have Hur al-‘Ayn who will also get sad on their behalf and are eagerly awaiting them in Paradise. Why can’t there be anyone awaiting women who will also be sad for them?
Women are humans too and get sad when they know that just because of their gender, they do not have any creation in Paradise awaiting them. This means that men get everything women are getting and more. Why can’t women have the same? I am hating myself and wish I never existed because I feel discriminated against and inferior.
Answer to the Follow-Up Question
Thank you for following up on your question. I am sorry that you feel frustrated and inferior but unless you pull yourself out of this thought process, you won’t overcome this negativity.
Allah Most High in His infinite wisdom has created men and women differently. He has made their rewards different because He knows and decides what motivates each gender and what each gender is capable of. As a servant who believes that there is no God but Allah and that Muhammad is His Messenger, you must submit and trust in Him. Establishing this trust and submission is essential, and you must understand that the full scope of this world will only become apparent to you in the afterlife.
Please read all the links that I sent in my previous answer.
I, personally, am not saddened by not having any creation awaiting me in Paradise, as another creation’s emotions have absolutely no effect on my life and my afterlife. A maiden’s tears or the tears of any other creation in Paradise don’t help me make my decisions, don’t grant me closeness to Allah, don’t help me pray on time, and don’t encourage me to be the best that I can be. So, please find something that will motivate you and dissuade you from sin, and seek only that which benefits. Being grumpy about who is or is not waiting for you will get you nowhere.
Allah Most High as told us, “And so We have revealed to you a Quran in Arabic, so you may warn the Mother of Cities and everyone around it, and warn of the Day of Gathering—about which there is no doubt—(when) a group will be in Paradise and a group in the Blaze.” [Quran, 42:7]
May Allah give you the best of this world and the next.
[Ustadha] Shazia Ahmad
Checked and Approved by Shaykh Faraz Rabbani