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Dealing with Infidelity: My Struggle with Marriage and Repentance

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Muftionline.co.za

Q: I have been married now for 15 years. I have three children. My son is doing hifz. I just found out that my husband has been closely associated with a mutual friend. He has helped her purchase a car and often chats and gives her company as her husband has left her. She is Muslim but frequents clubs and night life. He enjoys this life too as he is never home with my kids and I. It was posted on facebook by her husband that my husband is a lucky guy because he has her. I don’t wish to share a life with this man anymore as he has disrespected me and does not give me the companionship I desire. I have asked him to set me free and grant me my three talaaqs. He won’t. Mufti I don’t think its fair that he has best of both worlds. I realised I have sinned by asking for talaaq. What do I do to repent and what advice do you have for me on how to deal with this problem as I cannot bear to look at him. He feels like dirty trash to me.please help me.


A: The more effective way is that you improve the environment of the home. Commence with the following program at home:

1. Recite some portion of the Qur’an.

2. Conduct ta’leem of Fazaa’il-e-Sadaqaat, Fazaa’il-e-A’maal and Bahishti Zewar for approximately 15 minutes in the mornings and evenings.

3. Do zikr of the kalimah, Durood Shareef and istighfaar.

4. Make a collective du’aa at the end of each session, begging Allah Ta`ala for His special help, mercy and forgiveness for oneself and the rest of the ummah.

If your husband does not want to participate in these A’maal, then do not force him.

For further details refer to http://muftionline.co.za/node/7146

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from MuftiOnline.co.za, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

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