Using speech techniques to make one’s spouse love one

Answered according to Hanafi Fiqh by

Q: I would like to know if I can speak to my wife by implanting thoughts in her mind to love me without her realizing this consciously to improve my marriage. These techniques are taught in NLP Neuro-linguistic programming which teaches people how to use language to influence others by saying a sentence in a way where you are telling the mind what to do. For example, instead of saying you should love me, I said to her you can feel yourself loving me more and more now. Is this permissible for me to do?


A: These methods that are introduced generally by people who have no consciousness of the hereafter and no vestige of shame and modesty are suspect. And things of suspicion and doubt must be avoided.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

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