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Being uncomfortable around one’s in-laws

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Muftionline.co.za

Q: My father in-law is a very arrogant man and he likes bossing people around. He also swears a lot- I just can’t get myself to stay in the same room he is in. I feel very uncomfy because my parents never swore in front of us and never did they shout at us  and many a times he complains about me
that I don’t speak to him. He even told my husband that I’m rude and have no respect for him. I am a very happy person but since I got married most
things I say he will find a problem with so I just stopped talking when I go to their place. I don’t mean like I don’t speak to them its more like I will
only speak when they ask something. I feel very out of place at their place as I’m the only daughter in-law. My mother in-law again likes speaking out of turn and will tell people we don’t come to them and I don’t want them to see the grand kids. We see them once a week. I’m a housewife with no transport and my husband works late and its awkward with small kids at night to go out. He sees his dad everyday as they work together. What do I do in this case? I so many times have the urge to confront them but I just hold back because it would be disrespectful.


A: Don’t worry. We feel what you are doing is right. Make du`aa for them and wish well for them.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from MuftiOnline.co.za, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

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