My Nikah with my husband was done in August 2016, which was not announced to the family. My husband said that he will divorce his first wife and then will come to my house with a marriage proposal. His first wife was pregnant with their second child at the time so he was waiting for his child’s birth. After the birth she stayed with his parents at their home for a few months and then left for her mother’s house and lived with them for 8 months. My husband again promised that he will come to my house with a marriage proposal in December of 2017, and openly perform and announce the Nikah but his father did not let him divorce his first wife. His father is putting a condition that if he divorces his first wife, he will divorce his mother. My husband, who lives and supports his parents, then promised me that he would speak to his parents and explain to them how he has never been happy with his first wife. He also said that he would do anything to be with me even if he has to leave his house.
A few months back, we got into an argument, while he was complaining that I don’t give him time etc., in the heat of the argument, I said let’s just end this. He was pretty angry too and said “I son of so and so, give me wife so and so Talaq, he said this three times. After that we hung up the phone and did not speak for two days. Then he sent me a message through one of his friends explaining that he is upset and crying over what happened and asking to talk to me. We spoke and he explained that this is only one divorce. I asked a few scholars from Jamia Ashrafia and others, they all said the Nikah is still intact and we have 2 more chances, but I feel it is over and he does not believe me. Therefore, I need a fatwa, which explains the exact ruling for my situation. This way, I can move on and not get involved in any sin. I do not want to ruin his first marriage and I do not want him to leave his parents since he is the one supporting them.
Walaikumassalam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuhu
الجواب و باللہ التوفیق
As per the situation described in your question, if the husband has in fact uttered the words mentioned, then all three divorces have taken effect, you have become strangers for each other and it is considered impermissible for you to lead a married life together.
عن عائشة:أن رجلا طلق امرأته ثلاثا فتزوجت فطلق فسئل النبي صلى الله عليه و سلم أتحل للأول ؟ قال ( لا حتى يذوق عسيلتها كما ذاق الأول )
(صحیح بخاری:کتاب الطلاق:باب من اجاز الطلاق،۴۹۶۱)
عن سہل بن سعد رضي اللّٰہ عنہ في ہذا الخبر قال فطلقہا ثلاث تطلیقات عند رسول اللّٰہ صلی اللّٰہ علیہ وسلم فأنفذہ رسول اللّٰہ صلی اللّٰہ علیہ وسلم۔
(سنن أبي داؤد ۱؍۳۰۶ رقم: ۲۲۵۰)
وَإِنْ كان الطَّلَاقُ ثَلَاثًا في الْحُرَّةِ وَثِنْتَيْنِ في الْأَمَةِ لم تَحِلَّ له حتى تَنْكِحَ زَوْجًا غَيْرَهُ نِكَاحًا صَحِيحًا وَيَدْخُلَ بها ثُمَّ يُطَلِّقَهَا أو يَمُوتَ عنها كَذَا في الْهِدَايَةِ وَلَا فَرْقَ في ذلك بين كَوْنِ الْمُطَلَّقَةِ مَدْخُولًا بها أو غير مَدْخُولٍ بها كَذَا في فَتْحِ الْقَدِيرِ (فتاویٰ ہندیۃ:۱/۴۷۲)
فقط واللہ اعلم بالصواب