Girl leaving home to live with a Christian

Q: My brother’s daughter has left home to be with a Christian man of the same age (21). This has brought great shame on her parents and despite pleading with her to stay, she left the family home. Until now she was very obedient but now she says she has no belief in Islam and does not want to be a Muslim. It pains us to hear this from her and her parents have made a decision to disown her. Her father has told us all that if we have any contact at all with her we will also be disowned. She is now living in a very poor and sad situation, missing her family but not wanting to return to the life of religion she had before. My question is how should we all, as a family, deal with this? It has torn her parents apart who have decided that in order to continue to please Allah they must not see their daughter any more. They have demanded her siblings end contact also. If she continued her relationship are they right to behave in this way? Or should there be contact and support in the hope she may return. If this man converts to Islam should she then be accepted back? Please advise – nobody knows what is for the best for this confused young lady. Surely Allah must judge for her sins and we must show compassion in the meantime.


A: It is right to break up a relationship purely for the sake of Allah Ta`ala. However, if some third party could of his own encourage her to come back to Islam, it would be advisable.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)