Refusing to accept gifts on occasions

Q: A person is living in a community where the people exchange gifts as a custom (rasm wo riwaj) for example when visits newborn baby gold is given to baby,at the time of marriage, money or gold is given to brides parents, at the time of opening of newly constructed house gifts and money are given by all people, at the time when a girl gets her first menses gold is given to her, at the time of khatna money is given to the boy and so on. These all hadyas are like forced hadyas because the person is giving gifts to maintain his social status not for the sake of allah because when he refuses to give or take gifts in any occasion mentioned above he is viewed low by that community. And also these customs have created big problems for many people who has very low monthly income but these people also finds money from any were to keep his social image. Now this person wants to demolish all rasm wo riwaj and exchange gifts in the way of sunnah at any time he wishes and not in particular occasion.for this to be possible he refuses all the gifts given by the people when all the above mentioned occasions occur in his family as a step to demolish the custom and and seek excuse that; “if you are very much willing to give the gift please give it to us at any time not in this occasion”. Will he be sinning when he refuses the gifts? Is this a good decision taken by him in you ulama’s view?



  1. No, he will not be sinning.
  2. Insha-Allah.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)