Q: I just got married last month and I also don’t want to live with my parents because my father creates a miserable situation at home which is going to make an impact on my spouse, my future children and me.
My mother is suffering from this since her marriage and she feels lonely. I asked her to live with me but she said that I can’t leave your father but my father does not understand things.
I live in a different city but I want to take care of them because they are alone. I have one elder brother but he is also not interested in living with them.
Before marriage I asked them to move to a city where we can live as neighbours and my mother said Yes it is okay. Now she emotionally blackmailed me and said that we will live with you in the same house so I had to say Yes. I want to take care of them but don’t want to live with them in the same house. I said Yes to my mother.
Nowadays, I am with my parents and I am feeling that my parents do not respect my privacy with my wife. I am very very confused about what to do. What I am thinking is that I will ask my mother that if a miserable situation arises in my presence then I will move out and live somewhere else.
A: You can take a dwelling that has a out house or granny cottage. Let them be in the granny cottage and your home will be totally separate. They will not enter your house without your permission. If you want to be of service to them you may freely go up to them and serve them.
And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)