Q: I’ve been in a relationship with someone for the past five years, the reason we didn’t get married earlier was because my mother dissaproved. After a while I lost interest in the young man. Then I met someone new, I love this new person alot, but we had a had some issues and we broke up for a while about four months, so the first guy who had been in the picture earlier asked me if he could marry me so I said okay he could, but a month later the second guy returned back into my life and my heart preferd to be with him, but the other person had already introduced himself to my family.
1. What is the penalty for calling off the engagement with him so I could marry the one my heart is inclined towards?
2. What is the penalty for running away and getting married without my guardians consent, cause I can’t tell them about the second person, cause he’s not from the same race as I am.
I’d read a question were the answer was that it was shameful to do so, is it just shameful or is there a penalty for doing so with Allah Ta’ala.
A: You need to be drowned in shame. The right procedure is not to do things independently of your family. Being around with one person and then a second person and then coming back to the first person, what impression does this leave a person with. If your children come to know that this was our mother what will they think of you. Sincerely beg Allah’s forgiveness and abandon this type of a life. Thereafter consult with your family as to how you should shape and continue with your life.
And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
Answered by:
Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)