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Revolt Against Forced Nikah: My Struggle to Choose Love Over Pressure

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Muftionline.co.za

Q: I am a 25 year old sunni girl. My father is hafz of Quran. I was pressurized to marry with my cousin brother while my family and my cousin brother family were knowing I wanted to marry with a good Muslim boy who is doctor, dr ahmad, and he was a dawa worker too. I broke my engagement for doctor ahmad. I refused many proposal for nikah. I resist l cried and was taking medicine for sleep n headache for 3 yrs. But my father said Let her cry, she will have to accept my decision at any cost.

Then my parents stop talking with me and changed their behaviour to pressurize on me and my father said to doctor ahmad Because you are not of my location. I wanted to keep my daughter near me. This was his basis of rejection to dr ahmad. Dr.ahmad replied to him. It can’t be a basis of rejection as per sharia for proposal to daughter marriage.

As per kufu he was from a good family background ,compatible with me. Knowing all my facts and choice.my cousin brother sent proposal to my father for nikah with me. I warned my cousin brother don’t marry with me otherwise you may get divorce in future.but he said. Because I love you ayesha and your father also like me So this nikah will be valid. Later after nikah I will treat very well with you.so you will start loving with me.

Because every one was against me and was blaming not to listening my fathers choice. So I had to accept nikah with my cousin brother. After one year of nikah. I text to doctor ahmad.I said there is nothing like wife and husband relationship between me and my husband. Dr ahmad told me. I will still accept you. I said to ahmad my husband don’t behave badly with me.but still I couldn’t stop loving you. Then my husband told to dr ahmad I admit my fault.she still cry for you ahmad.if you will ask me Now i am ready to give divorce. Then dr.ahmad gave another chance to my husband and make an agreement He said to my husband During 1.5 yr of your married life You couldn’t won your wife heart. Ahmad said I am giving 1.5 more year to spend you couple together. If she would still like to marry with ahmad. You will have to give her divorce. But if love would develop as a husband wife between you couple.then DrAhmad wll go away from you people

In this agreement everyone were agreed.

My 2 questions in this regard are these of the followings QUESTIONS:

(1)= In such a marriage where girl is accepting nikah due to pressure and her family members were making her fear of father might get ill or he may die(incase if she would say NO during nikah consent.) Parents,boy with whom girl is going to marry .and all family members of boy were aware as this was a forceful nikah. In such nikah if later girl revolt and want to marry with her previous choice. So she would become sinner?

(2) i fear always of one thing Because ultimately I agreed for nikah consent yes (Even that time if I would get freedom I would definitely choose dr ahmad) So I might become questionable in front of Allah. As I had a chance to say NO But I said yes so it was my fault( at that time if I would say no .I could loose my family ,dad) Now my family accepting their fault up to some extent.so now they won’t do much pressure on me. So please help me Can I go with dr ahmad? My father said Divorce is bad things.so its my advice don’t do it. But Dr ahmad replied Divorce is really bad but not this kind of nikah. He further added Nikah is worst thing among all permissible acts. But forcing n pressurizing for such nikah on adult girl is even not a permissible act. As you were under pressure of loosing your dad Your husband was also aware of all facts but he snatched your rights ayesha. So as per hadith doing such nikah is As it was not happened. You are free to continue your nikah Or You may come to me. You won’t be sinner in sha Allah.

Bismillaah

A:

1. She will not be sinful if she does not feel inclined towards him. It was wrong of the family to push her into marriage if she was disinclined.

2. It is true that you will not be sinful because you had mentioned to them that you do not have any inclination to the person.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.

Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from MuftiOnline.co.za, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

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