Marital problems

Answered according to Hanafi Fiqh by

Q: I have a question and hope to receive the answer in the light of Quran and hadith at the earliest. I am the only son if my parents, my dad has a multiple alignment but my mother though in her late 60’s is in good health alhamdulillah,in addition to this I am married and have two kids and one wife. Soon after marriage my wife and my mother could not accommodate each other well and I often had to listen to their complaints. I always thought my mother was less at fault. After few years of marriage I created two kitchens in the same house, in spite of this problems remained and in 2010 when things went out of control, I bought a separate accommodation for my family on the instructions of my parents to shift. Slowly things started to improve and till 2015 all was well. During this period have fulfilled all my duties towards my parents as well as wife. Then In 2015 my Dads health deteriorated and we shifted back to my parental house. It was not a force to my wife, instead she willingly agreed to go back but with a condition that she will not put up in a different kitchen. I was reluctant to her condition and wanted to have a different kitchen for my family in our parental home. At last I reluctantly agreed. My worst fear came true, again my mom and my wife went well with each other for a year no doubt with minor issues. But after some time things started happening again and one fine day my wife decided to go back to her house, even I agreed as I was fed up of all the nonsense my wife was attributing towards my mother. I could no longer take the behavior of my wife towards my mother. Soon I agreed to shift and left my potential home once again, leaving behind a hurt parents, sisters and all relatives. Everyone very angry towards my wife and her parents and my in-laws towards me and my parents blaming each other. I did not offend my parents for my wife and gave my wife a separate accommodation she wanted. Have I committed any sin by leaving my parents alone though I visit them every day even twice a day and ask them if I can do anything. I have arranged a full time servant for them as well. I live 4 km away from my parents. According to me I had no other option but to shift as I could not see my mother being dominated by my wife, as my wife wanted most of the things to happen as per her taste. My wife is a good lady as well follows Islam, had good intentions but her short temper is all that is not good in her. I am very tense please advice me what should I do to ease out my life as this issues has fully engulfed me and I has become difficult to concentrate on other issues like work etc. Thank you very much.


A: If you are taking good care of them then insha-Allah you have not done anything wrong.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)

This answer was collected from, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Ta’leemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa.

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