Q: I have this problem for long time. It first started with a small doubt and after that it felt like if I do anything, bad or a sin, it’s shirk because that means that I am giving more importance to it than Allah. I felt like talking to girls is forbidden so if I talk to girls it’s shirk. So if I talk to girls then I am giving more importance to talk to girls than to Allah. So then I stopped talking. For a few days I ignore this thought and talked to girls, then I felt like I am committing shirk. One part of me was like it’s not really shirk, if I make it as shirk allah will forgive and u can do that as a normal sin. After some time its gone, then that thought comes that whatever I do when I watch a movie or whenever I talk to my friend. After a while those thoughts disappear. I ignore those thoughts and live my life as normal Muslims and now those kinds of thoughts strted coming even stronger. Whatever I do, those kind of thoughts are coming that if its shirk, I’ll stop doing it. Is doing this confusion and this mindset shirk or not? Because I feel like even if it is not shirk by doing this mean I am ok with this even it’s shirk but am not ok .. I now these things are sin ins Islam but these are not shirk ryt even am confused to talk to mom this is not not only for this matter even when i talk with my frndz these kind of thoughts are coming ? So I thought these friend or anyone not more important than Allah am talking to them as normAl as other muslims talks without giving more important but then my mind was like these things are not shirk ok I are not giving important to them but previous which U thought in beginning u did with doubts no so those are shirk even if I talk without giving more important and as normal I make this as shirk so now if I do that it shirk …so now doing these things which are not actually shirk is shirk or not ?? Is there is anything I can do to make those things as normal sin or normal thing because these thoughts came from waswas problem no please give me some solutions … nd help me to understand are these things are shirk or not ? Is theres anything I can do to be normal
A: Refrain from speaking to non-mahram women and observe strict purda with them. Make ta’leem of fazaail-e-amaal and fazaail-e-sadaqaat daily for approximately 15 to 20 minutes. It is advisable for you to keep in contact with a pious Sunnah adhering Aalim or Shaikh living near you so that he may be able to guide you in all matters of life.
And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
Mufti Zakaria Makada
Checked & Approved:
Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)