Not getting married to the girl one was involved with

Answered according to Hanafi Fiqh by

Q: Its regarding marriage. I had a girlfriend (we didn’t do the unlawful thing together) and we were set to get married the halal way with both of our families involved. Now, 5-6 months before marriage, the girl started to say lie statement to me about her family’s opinion about our marriage. (WaAllah I believe her decency and she was and is not involved in any ill act with someone else). She did one big mistake, she faked below things.

1. Her family doesn’t consider me (her to be husband) as a good match.

2. The boy isn’t financially well settled.

3. Her family is interested in getting married to someone else who is more better in wealth and better in family.

4. Created an imaginary person with whom her family wants her to get married.

I trusted her and assumed that all she said is correct (she said all this to me in a long period, not suddenly and hence i believed her) I was so frustrated that I told her that I no longer am interested to get married to you, you can marry the person your family wants you to get married with. She accepted that its her fault that she lied. She cried a lot and said sorry, in front of everyone from her family and my family. But I was so frustrated with this drama that I could no longer believe her and I said, “Sorry, I cant marry you”. All this was around 2 years back. Now with the help of Allah I decided to move on and looking forward to marry someone else (not decided to whom, but just looking) Now, the ex-girl says me that she is still waiting for me and wants to get married to me only. Please suggest me what should I do here? Will it be a zulm from my side on her if i don’t get married to her? I tried to tell her that she should get married to someone else but she insists and says she loves me. I’m not getting what to do. I want to get married to someone else, but not sure if it would be correct to leave ex-girl?


A: If you are not interested in her then there is nothing wrong in telling her that you are not interested.

And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.


Answered by:

Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)