What remedies are there for men who ejaculate prematurely while being intimate with their wives? Jazak Allah
ANSWER
In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,
The following is an excerpt from my book titled ‘Islamic Guide to Sexual Relations‘ which should help answer your query Insha Allah. (It may be a good idea to get hold of a copy for a general understanding of all issues related to sexual intimacy between spouses. Details on how to obtain one are available in the ‘Books’ section of this website):
‘In order to delay ejaculation, the husband should do the following:
a) Avoid having his sexual organ stroked or caressed during foreplay. The less contact made between his sexual organ and his wife’s body, the easier it will be for him to control himself.
b) When having sex, divert his attention to something else, so that it helps him control himself.
c) Both spouses should avoid excessive movement during the actual act of sex, because excessive movement will result in him ejaculating early. (See: Usul al-Mu’ashara al-Zawjiyya P: 71-72)
d) Imam Murtada al-Zabidi states in his commentary of the Ihya Uloom al-Din of Imam al-Ghazali (Allah have mercy on both) that the most beneficial remedy for someone affected by premature ejaculation is to avoid having sex before foreplay. He should sexually arouse his wife by playing around with her, kissing her, stroking her breasts, embracing her and the like. Then, when he sees that her colour has changed and her eyes have become red [out of desire for him], and he feels that she is ready, prepared, and desirous of him, only then should he initiate actual sexual intercourse. (See: Ithaf al-Sadat al-Muttaqin bi Sharh Ihya Uloom al-Din 6:176)’
And Allah Knows Best
[Mufti] Muhammad ibn Adam
Darul Iftaa
Leicester , UK