I live with my mom at our mother’s home as my husband works abroad. I go to my in law’s place if there is any functions and stay few days there. Recently my mom went to spend some days with my brother and family who lives in another country. As a result I went to my sister’s home but my husband wants me to go to his parents’ house. I told him I will go and spend some days there also. But mainly I will stay at my sister’s place where I feel more comfortable. But he wants me to stay only few days here and stay at his patents’ house mainly. Often he wants me to go to his parent home while to while and stay there for few days. This time he says me to go because his mum and sister both also not well and I can be supportive (But I think if I go there their work increase and with my baby it is bit difficult me to be supportive but I help them whenever possible )They do not treat me badly and also they love our child but still I feel more comfortable at my sister’s place because I have sever migraines and I fear If I stay with in-laws for long, unnecessary arguments , clashes will occur. They have quarrels with their relations. I deal with them and talk with them very carefully. (I cannot tell this reason to him). I want to know that am I sinning by denying his request. Don’t I have the right to choose the place to live?
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
After marriage, you came under the authority of your husband; it is mandatory for you to abide by him in all the lawful affairs and you shall become sinful in case you violate him. It is not good for you to stay at your sister’s home. The bahnoi is non-mahram and it is mandatory to observe purdah with him. You should stay at your husband’s home and sometimes may go and stay at your parents house.
Allah knows Best!
Darul Uloom Deoband