1) I am from Istanbul; Turkey. My parents have sent me to study in USA. During my studies in USA, I have become more religiously inclined after joining the Tableegh Jamaat. I went out for three days Jamaat and joined the lectures at the Markaz. My father is a non- practicing Muslim. He drinks alcohol and does not want me to be religiously inclined. He wants me to perform un-Islamic acts which I do not like to do. When he found out that I was religiously inclined, he came to the USA and brought me back home and wants me to complete my studies at home in Turkey. He went to the Tableeghi Markaz and complained about me. One Tableeghi elder gave me Mashwara that I should do as my father commands me to do so. I shaved my beard despite knowing that it is a sin. What should I do?
2) After I complete my studies, I do not know what to do. I want to become an Aalim but my father won’t approve. I am thinking of learning Islam at an American University. Please advise what to do. Please pray for Turkey to become more active in Tableegh.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu `alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
We commend you in your participation of the noble work of Tableegh. May Allah (Subhanhu Wa Ta’ala) accept all your noble efforts. Aameen.
We have analyzed your question and would like to draw your attention to the following issues raised in point one:
You state that your father is a non- practicing Muslim. He drinks alcohol and engages in other un- Islamic practices.
There are many ways to deal with this behavior of your father:
Shariah emphasizes the importance of respecting one’s parents. Always show respect to one’s parents. Do not let your religiousness affect your relationship with your parents.
Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) says:
و وصينا الانسان بوالديه احسانا
“And we have enjoined upon Mankind showing compassion to parents” ( Surah al- Ankaboot, chapter 29, verse 8)
You state that your father wants you to perform certain un- Islamic practices such as shaving of the beard e.t.c. You did shave your beard despite not wanting to do so. We would like to draw your attention to the following:
It is not permissible to obey one’s parents in any action/s which is not in conformance with the dictates of Shariah.
Nabi (Sallallahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) said:
لَا طَاعَةَ لِأَحَدٍ فِي مَعْصِيَةِ اللَّهِ
“There is to be no obedience to anyone in the disobedience of Allah” (Jami Ma’mar Bin Raashid, Vol.11, Pg.335)
The above Hadeeth clearly expounds on the impermissibility of obeying anyone if it entails disobeying Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala). One’s parents also fall under the purview of the above Hadeeth.
In light of the above, it will not be necessary for one to shave one’s beard even though one’s parents instruct one to do so. Shaving of the beard which is less than one fist is Haraam (forbidden).
Explain to your father the importance of adhering to the Shariah. It might be a good idea to obtain booklets expounding the importance of obeying Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) and keeping it within close range of him.
Consult with a local Aalim who might befriend your father and advise him accordingly.
Employ Hikmah (wisdom) when dealing with one’s parents. Always be diplomatic in your approach towards your parents. You might have the right objective and aim in mind, but the method of conveying the message across maybe totally incorrect and not suitable to the situation. Always deploy wisdom when dealing with such serious matters.
You state that you consulted with an elder in the Tableegh movement. We cannot comment on the statements of the elder in the Tableegh movement since we are unable to confirm such statements. Nevertheless, if any person advises another to violate the laws of Shariah, that is unacceptable.
We would advise you to study in an environment which is more conducive to the dictates of the Shariah.
Du’aa is the weapon of the believer. Implore Allah (Subhanu Wa Ta’ala) to alleviate you from the predicament you are faced with. May Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) change the condition of your father to be in accordance with the dictates of the Shariah. Aameen.
In reference to point two:
We would not advise one to study Islamic Law at any Western Educational Institute.
Explain to your father the great rewards and merits in studying Deeni knowledge. Obtain some booklets on the virtues and merits of studying Ilme- Deen and keep them within close range of your father. Explain to your father the lofty position of one who studies Ilme- Deen.
Kindly refer to Fatwaa # 19721 at the following link for more details: http://www.askimam.org/fatwa/fatwa.php?askid=eb1ab1b18bb69b2777c47de010e177f0
We advise you to carefully consider your options before making any decision. One should take into consideration one’s Deen/religion before making any decision. Make adherence to Shariah a priority before all other priorities. Make adherence to Shariah the determining factor in making your final decision.
We make Du’aa that Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) alleviate you from your predicament and make your country more active in the noble effort of Tableegh. Aameen.
And Allah knows best.
Moulana Ismail Desai,
Durban, South Africa
Student Darul Iftaa
Checked and Approved
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
daruliftaa.net