Assalam Allykum, I know a respectable family facing deep trouble with regard to marriage of their only daughter, Farha. She is highly educated and has bright professional prospects. This family never had the good relation with relatives from paternal side from their home town. Suhail, the son of paternal aunt of the Farha, is a person with bad moral character. He had affairs with many girls and is known for the use of drugs and other illegal activities. He did not complete his basic studies and spent all the money, given by parent for the education, for pleasure and enjoyment with other girls. He is known for cheating and criminal activities. He never got any job and living off on the parent’s money. Two years ago, in his hometown he was officially engaged with another cousin, Sarah, belonging to a modest family. Meanwhile under habitual attitude of flirting and constantly looking out for other girls, he contacted Farha last year, while she was away from her family for a project. Farha did not know about his activities and reality, but she knew that he has been engaged to her cousin Sara. He pretended to be a simple and nice person and told her that he has a job in a metro city. He convinced her that he is victim of a conspiracy from the Sarah’s side and under family pressure he got engaged to with Sarah, while in reality he liked her and wants to marry her. He asked her help in breaking this engagement. He requested her to secretly marry her just on paper so that he can show that Nikahnama to break the engagement. He also told her that nobody will know about it from your side and this will give him some time so that he will settle down and then he will come to your family with a formal marriage proposal. He asked her to come to different city where he has a job for just one day so that he can arrange a Qazi for Nikah. She agreed, though hesitatingly. Finally, in April 2010, he made an affidavit with notary that they are adult and want to marry. He affixed their photos on that affidavit and made her sign it. This affidavit was showed to a Qazi. In spite of knowing well that Wali from girl’s side are not present and both are student, He agreed to perform Nikah with large sum of money. Finally, Nikah was carried out in presence of Sohail’s two friends with dubious characters. Girl returned to her place that evening. Meanwhile, due to his absconding without telling anyone, Sarah’s parents broke the engagement and fixed her marriage with someone else. Few weeks later, Sohail was again in contact with former fiancée, Sarah, convincing her that he absconded under pressure from Farha, while in reality wants to marry her only. He suggested to her that they should run away from that city and marry secretly. He promised various things but Sarah did not agree to him remembering well that previously Suhail had ran away from his commitment. Finally Sarah’s marriage, as fixed by her parents was successfully carried out. Only Allah knows how many girls were cheated by Sohail in this manner. His parents couldn’t do anything and despite of knowing all his activities, they supported Sohail in a blind love for their child. One year passed. Farha and Sohail were secretly in contact over mobile sms despite living over 400 kms away. Farah was constantly asking him when he is going to come with marriage proposal, but Sohail made up various stories and continued flirting. Sohail on the other hand was also flirting with Sarah over mobile. He has number of mobile phones, each phone for each girl. One day, this was accidently discovered by Sarah’s mother and she grabbed 3 phones from Sohail. She came to know that Suhail was flirting with Farah. She handed over the mobile to Farah’s family. After reading all the sms stored in the mobiles, Farah realized the reality of Sohail and felt greatly cheated. Farah’s family was also shocked by disclosure of secret marriage. Farah went into depression and family couldn’t come out of the trauma for few days. Nobody wants this marriage. Everyone knew and heard a lot about Sohail and his activities. Nobody can imagine a match of 12th passed sohail with Msc with Distinction Farah. Even Farah desperately wanted to end relation. After few days Farah’s parent went to Sohail place seeking the original affidavits and Nikahnama, which Sohail kept with him. On seeing them Sohail ran away and they then met his parents and told them the entire situation. But instead of helping them out, they started blaming Farah for all this. Even after acknowledging Farah’s mistake, issue did not sorted and Farah’s parent had to left the Sohail’s house insulted and empty handed. Later on, it was also discovered from Sohail’s friends that Sohail thinks that Farah is very rich and he might get good share if he marries Farah. Farah’s family now thinks that all this is planned by Sohail’s Father. This act requires lot of money and experience and without his father’s support Sohail can’t do this. His father is known to be very greedy and corrupt and might eyeing the more heard but little verified property of Farah’s family. Farah’s family are sure that Sohail and his father will definitely create obstacles in the Farah’s marriage if they don’t succeed in their plan. It took a lot of effort to convince Farah that life is not over and a good person will definitely accept her as his wife. Now many marriage proposals from well to do and respected family are coming for Farah. But her family is in fix. They want to come out this thick web of tragedy and end all their relations with Sohail and his family. They want to see Farah marry with well settled boy. But before that they want steer clear from this controversy. Farah’s family believes that this marriage is absolutely not valid for following reasons: 1. Nikah was performed without presence or consent of Wali. 2. Sohail is not kafu for Farha in Educational, social, economic and cultural aspects. 3. Sohail undertook this act with false promise and fake assurance that he has a job and will soon send the marriage proposal. 4. Marriage was kept secret for more than one year. 5. No direct contact with each other since more than a year. 6. Sohail is mentally not sound and non seriousness in commitment is clearly visible by activities like habitual flirting and planning to marry another girl even after this marriage. 7. Sohail undertook this act with intention to acquire money and property after marriage possibly under the guidance of his Father. 8. His purported plan to ask for big amount of money in return of the original Nikahnama and Affidavit if he didn’t succeed in acquiring the property. Under this background it is requested to kindly guide under the light of Islam what should Farah’s family do to get rid of Sohail and marry another person?
Assalāmu `alaikum Warahmatullāhi Wabrakatuh,
The contents of the email are very disturbing. This is the consequence of not consulting with appropriate people.
Nevertheless, Kindly inform us which country and town Farah resides.
Did Farah and Sohail consummate?
Explain the types of disputes between Farah and Sohail. Did he tell her to go away, I don’t want you etc?
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best,
Muftī Ebrahim Desai
Daruliftaa
35 Candella Rd, Durban, South Africa