Why some get their choice of partner and others dont. Although we understand Allah knows best but as a human being one feels let down in life and very bitter 2. To complete half Islam is marriage, so why some do not end up getting married, is that also their taqdeer?
Masha Allah we commend you on taking the step to find out more on an issue that is worrying you.
The concept of taqdeer is rather a broad concept, however in light of your question we will try and answer your query. To understand taqdeer it necessitates a sincere belief that Allah loves you and does not want to cause you any harm. That Allah is Very Kind, Caring and Compassionate and Loving.
The system of Allah Ta’ala is to follow what has been prescribed to us eg in marriage to seek a suitable partner. The first quality is of piety (one who loves Allah Ta’ala and fears Allah Ta’ala.). Beauty, wealth etc is secondary and a bonus. Make sincere dua. After making the necessary efforts one does not find a suitable partner then resign the will to Allah Ta’ala. From the Hadith we learn that Rasullullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam) has said; “Strive to acquire what is beneficial for you, seek the aid of Allah Ta’ala, do not lose courage and if a setback overtakes you, do not say: If I had done this it would have happened like this. Instead say Allah Ta’ala has ordained this. Whatever He has willed, has happened.”
Remember if you have made the effort (Tadbeer) and not turned down good marriage proposals etc and dua then resign to the will of Allah Ta’ala (Tafweez) then you to will get the reward you are seeking. Allah Ta’ala is Most Just and Caring and will reward you for your efforts.
Note: Should you not get the right choice of partner, perchance Allah Ta’ala in His infinite wisdom is protecting you from a rocky abusive marriage. This is an epidemic in the world and many women are suffering. Or Allah Ta’ala may take Deeni work from you which you may not be able to do should you marry, or perchance the time is not right and when the time is right for you, you most certainly will find better than what you expected Insha Allah as rewards for your sabr.
Also noteworthy to remember, that non-muslims may receive their reward in this world for good they do but their end result is disastruos because of non believing in Allah Ta’ala. Proof of these examples and in the Quraan. Also further study of the lifestyles of actors/ actreses- the bright lights show happiness with their partners, but deliving into thier background shows sordid, painfull lives with drugs illicit relationship etc.
Also in sincere repentance for our sins like T.V, hurting people, reading distasteful literature etc, surleyopens up Allah Ta’ala’s mercy, love and bounties on a person. Also outwardly what may appera as a calamity may be goodness and a protection from major harm.
Always remember Allah loves us so give your heart to Allah first.
and Allah Ta’ala Knows Best
2SOCIAL DEPT.
CHECKED AND APPROVED: Mufti Ebrahim Desai