i am 27 years old, is it okay to marry without the will of parents; my parents want me to marry in a family i dont like, i have told them so many times but they are still insist, my father has now started behaving very rudely…

Answered according to Hanafi Fiqh by Askimam.org

ASA, my question is about marriage. i am 27 years old, is it okay to marry without the will of parents; my parents want me to marry in a family i dont like, i have told them so many times but they are still insist, my father has now started behaving very rudely with me and have told me that if i will have to leave them if i will marry somewhere else. kindly advise 

Answer

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh

There are two issues to this query

  • Will of parents

  • Age

You state that you do not have inclinations towards the person whom your parents would like to be your future husband. Since the decision of marrying such a boy will impact on your life, you should express your reservations in marrying this boy. We do understand that in issues of this nature the emotions overtakes sensible thinking and this approach causes more harm than ever. As a mature person you should engage with your family in such a manner that it does not jeopardize your relation with them as well as choose the partner you wish.

It is possible that your family has found some good in the person and therefore considers him/her the perfect match for you. One can never doubt that your parents and family will make an incorrect choice for you. Every person will strive to find someone who is good and compatible to you.

Furthermore, you should make Istikhara and consult Allah in your predicament. Allah states “Perhaps you like something but that is bad for you and likewise you dislike something but this is good for you”.

In conclusion we observe that you are 27 years and becoming older everyday. Shariah encourages one to marry at a young age if all the obligations could be fulfilled. We therefore advise that you finalize the issue and marry as soon as possible. Prolonging the marriage will result in further complications.

And Allah knows best

Wassalam

Muhammed Zakariyya Desai,
Assistant Mufti

Checked and Approved by:

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In’aamiyyah

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