Assalam Alaikum, I would appreciate your guidance with a current situation I am facing in my personal life. I am 23 years old living in London, United Kingdom. Approximately 6 months ago, I became estranged from my father due to his erratic and abusive behaviour. This led to myself and my immediate family to flee the home and move to another part of the country. I have had no contact with him since December 2018. Alhamdullilah I am now ready to get married but would like to ask the ruling in regards to the Wali. I know that one of the conditions of the marriage is that a Wali must ‘give away’ a sister to her future spouse. In this situation as I am estranged from him, what would be the ruling? I have a brother who is 15 years old (16 in July inshallah). Would he be a suitable wali for myself? My father has not only abused myself and my family both physically and mentally, but he has also committed numerous acts of adultery throughout the marriage to my mother hence the urgent need to leave the family home. I await patiently for your response and I appreciate your time inshallah.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
An adult female has the independent right to marry herself to a person who is Kufu (compatible in terms of social status). In this instance, she does not require the consent or presence of her Wali (guardian).[i] However, it is preferable for her to get her Wali’s approval.[ii]
If she marries a person who is not her Kufu, then the consent of her Wali is necessary.
You state that your father physically and mentally abused you and your brother and that he has committed adultery numerous times whilst in wedlock with your mother. Due to these reasons, you felt an urgent need to leave the house. Now you wish to get married and want to appoint a Wali. Under these circumstances, your brother can become your Wali in the place of your father.[iii]
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Muhammed Shafi
Student – Darul Iftaa
London, U.K.
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
26-02-1441| 25-10-2019
[i] الدر المختار وحاشية ابن عابدين (رد المحتار) (3/ 55)
(وَهُوَ) أَيْ الْوَلِيُّ (شَرْطُ) صِحَّةِ (نِكَاحِ صَغِيرٍ وَمَجْنُونٍ وَرَقِيقٍ) لَا مُكَلَّفَةٍ (فَنَفَذَ نِكَاحُ حُرَّةٍ مُكَلَّفَةٍ
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وَهَذَا تَصْرِيحٌ بِمَفْهُومِ الْمَتْنِ ذَكَرَهُ لِيُفِيدَ أَنَّ قَوْلَهُ فَنَفَذَ مُفَرَّعٌ عَلَيْهِ (قَوْلُهُ فَنَفَذَ إلَخْ) أَرَادَ بِالنَّفَاذِ الصِّحَّةَ وَتَرَتُّبَ الْأَحْكَامِ مِنْ طَلَاقٍ وَتَوَارُثٍ وَغَيْرِهِمَا لَا اللُّزُومَ، إذْ هُوَ أَخَصُّ مِنْهَا لِأَنَّهُ مَا لَا يُمْكِنُ نَقْضُهُ وَهَذَا يُمْكِنُ رَفْعُهُ إذَا كَانَ مِنْ غَيْرِ كُفْءٍ، فَقَوْلُهُ فِي الشُّرُنْبُلَالِيَّةِ أَيْ يَنْعَقِدُ لَازِمًا فِي إطْلَاقِهِ نَظَرٍ. وَاحْتُرِزَ بِالْحُرَّةِ عَنْ الْمَرْقُوقَةِ وَلَوْ مُكَاتَبَةً أَوْ أُمَّ وَلَدٍ وَبِالْمُكَلَّفَةِ عَنْ الصَّغِيرَةِ وَالْمَجْنُونَةِ، فَلَا يَصِحُّ إلَّا بِوَلِيٍّ كَمَا قَدَّمَهُ، وَأَمَّا حَدِيثُ «أَيُّمَا امْرَأَةٍ نَكَحَتْ نَفْسَهَا بِغَيْرِ إذْنِ وَلِيِّهَا فَنِكَاحُهَا بَاطِلٌ فَنِكَاحُهَا بَاطِلٌ فَنِكَاحُهَا بَاطِلٌ» وَحَسَّنَهُ التِّرْمِذِيُّ وَحَدِيثُ «لَا نِكَاحَ إلَّا بِوَلِيٍّ» رَوَاهُ أَبُو دَاوُد وَغَيْرُهُ، فَمُعَارَضٌ بِقَوْلِهِ – صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ – «الْأَيِّمُ أَحَقُّ بِنَفْسِهَا مِنْ وَلِيِّهَا» رَوَاهُ مُسْلِمٌ وَأَبُو دَاوُد وَالتِّرْمِذِيُّ وَالنَّسَائِيُّ وَمَالِكٌ فِي الْمُوَطَّأِ،
[ii] الدر المختار وحاشية ابن عابدين (رد المحتار) (3/ 55)
وَهِيَ هُنَا نَوْعَانِ: وِلَايَةُ نَدْبٍ عَلَى الْمُكَلَّفَةِ وَلَوْ بِكْرًا وَوِلَايَةُ إجْبَارٍ عَلَى الصَّغِيرَةِ وَلَوْ ثَيِّبًا وَمَعْتُوهَةٍ وَمَرْقُوقَةٍ كَمَا أَفَادَهُ بِقَوْلِهِ (وَهُوَ) أَيْ الْوَلِيُّ (شَرْطُ) صِحَّةِ (نِكَاحِ صَغِيرٍ وَمَجْنُونٍ وَرَقِيقٍ) لَا مُكَلَّفَةٍ (فَنَفَذَ نِكَاحُ حُرَّةٍ مُكَلَّفَةٍ
[iii] الدر المختار وحاشية ابن عابدين (رد المحتار) (3/ 54)
بَابُ الْوَلِيِّ (هُوَ) لُغَةً: خِلَافُ الْعَدُوِّ. وَعُرْفًا: الْعَارِفُ بِاَللَّهِ تَعَالَى وَشَرْعًا: (الْبَالِغُ الْعَاقِلُ الْوَارِثُ) وَلَوْ فَاسِقًا عَلَى الْمَذْهَبِ مَا لَمْ يَكُنْ مُتَهَتِّكًا، وَخَرَجَ نَحْوُ صَبِيٍّ وَوَصِيٍّ
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(قَوْلُهُ مَا لَمْ يَكُنْ مُتَهَتِّكًا) فِي الْقَامُوسِ: رَجُلٌ مُنْهَتِكٌ وَمُتَهَتِّكٌ وَمُسْتَهْتِكٌ لَا يُبَالِي أَنْ يَتَهَتَّكَ سِتْرُهُ اهـ قَالَ فِي الْفَتْحِ عَقِبَ مَا نَقَلْنَا عَنْهُ آنِفًا، نَعَمْ إذَا كَانَ مُتَهَتِّكًا لَا يَنْفُذُ تَزْوِيجُهُ إيَّاهَا بِنَقْصٍ عَنْ مَهْرِ الْمِثْلِ وَمِنْ غَيْرِ كُفْءٍ وَسَيَأْتِي هَذَا. اهـ. وَحَاصِلُهُ أَنَّ الْفِسْقَ وَإِنْ كَانَ لَا يُسْلَبَ الْأَهْلِيَّةَ عِنْدَنَا، لَكِنْ إذَا كَانَ الْأَبُ مُتَهَتِّكًا لَا يَنْفُذُ تَزْوِيجُهُ إلَّا بِشَرْطِ الْمَصْلَحَةِ وَمِثْلُهُ مَا سَيَأْتِي مِنْ قَوْلِ الْمُصَنِّفِ وَلَزِمَ وَلَوْ بِغَبْنٍ فَاحِشٍ أَوْ بِغَيْرِ كُفْءٍ إنْ كَانَ الْوَلِيُّ أَبًا أَوْ جَدًّا لَمْ يُعْرَفْ مِنْهُمَا سُوءُ الِاخْتِيَارِ وَإِنْ عُرِفَ لَا اهـ وَبِهِ ظَهَرَ أَنَّ الْفَاسِقَ الْمُتَهَتِّكَ وَهُوَ بِمَعْنَى سَيِّئِ الِاخْتِيَارِ لَا تَسْقُطُ وِلَايَتُهُ مُطْلَقًا لِأَنَّهُ لَوْ زَوَّجَ مِنْ كُفْءٍ بِمَهْرِ الْمِثْلِ صَحَّ كَمَا سَيَأْتِي بَيَانُهُ، وَهَذَا خِلَافُ مَا مَرَّ عَلَى الْبَزَّازِيَّةِ، وَلَا يُمْكِنُ التَّوْفِيقُ بِحَمْلِ مَا مَرَّ عَلَى هَذَا لِأَنَّ قَوْلَهُ فَلِلْقَاضِي أَنْ يُزَوِّجَ مِنْ الْكُفْءِ يَقْتَضِي سُقُوطَ وِلَايَةِ الْأَبِ أَصْلًا فَافْهَمْ.