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My husband and mother had an argument, how can I reconcile between them?

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Askimam.org

There is a heated argument between my mother and my husband about 7 months ago. I was sick and my mother wanted to take me home to take care of me which is in other city (300km)  but my husband didnot allow and they both argued with each other. After that incident my husband said that he will not take me to my parents house and if i want to go , he will not allow my 2 year old son to go with me. I ensured him that my mom will not interfare again in our life and also ask him to forgive her and let go. but he still didnot allow.it has been 6 months since my last visit he said that i am not breaking your kinship because i am allowing you to go and meet your parents and secondly i allow u to talk to them on phone. I cannot leave my child and meet my parents because he is just 2 years and he is totally dependent on me. and secondly i cannot travel alone according to islam. My parents are sick and old they cannot travel that far because their health is effected.They miss us and cried many times on phone. Al lah said obey your husband and donot break ties of kinship. I am obeyung him by not going . Is there any sin on my husband for break my and my sons kinship beacuse my son has a blood relation witg my parents. He claims that my parents are not in his kinship and he is not doing any thing wrong and there is no sin on him. 

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

As-salaamu `alaykum wa-ramatullahi wa-barakatuh.

Sister in Islam,

We take note of the contents of your mail.

It is clear that the heated argument you refer to has created ill feelings in your husband. While you acknowledge that your mother has erred and that you ensured your husband that she will not interfere again, your husband is still angry. Advise your mother to humble herself and to phone him and apologise. While we understand that may be a big call to make for your mother, however it is hoped that will cool down your husband`s anger.

You enquire whether your husband is sinful for breaking ties between your son and your parents. Sister, in many instances obtaining rulings of Shariah may not assist the cause. If your mother humbles herself and apologises, that may be the solution to your difficulty. Humility and forgiveness softens the hearts and creates muhabbat.

And Allah Ta`ala Knows Best.

Hussein Muhammad.

Student Darul Iftaa

Arusha, Tanzania

Checked and Approved by:

Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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