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Family dispute

Answered as per Hanafi Fiqh by Askimam.org

My sister got married in 2002. Since then till 2009 they were living happily and my brother in law was also nice with us. Later in 2009, my brother in law brought a marriage proposal for me, which happened to be his sister’s daughter. In the first instance my sister refused for the proposal, he tried in many ways to convince my sister to put forth the proposal in my family. To which my sister declined. Later he approached my father to which my father also politely declined. Later he tried in many ways to convince the proposal for nearly 1 year. Afterwards he started harassing my sister and forcing her to convince me and my family. To which my sister again refused bearing the harassment.

In 2011 we have fixed one proposal for me, which he came to know and stopped sending my sister to our home. But he told we can visit his home to see my sister and children. In nov 2011 my parents visited with wedding invitation of mine to his home and requested and begged him to forget all this as marriage is from GOD. He shouted at my parents and asked to get out. I got married in dec 2011 and he sent my sister only for 2 days with lot of begging from all the sides. We told his sister also but she is telling that she also tried to convince but he is not listening to patch up. He don’t have father and mother and any elders so we can’t approach any one. He is very very stubborn and rigid personality. After my marriage also we went once to his house for which he locked his house and didn’t allow any one of us. He told that he will give talaq if any one of us tries to come inside and asked us to leave immediately. We came back. Since 1.5 years he is not talking to us. And since almost one year my sister didn’t come to our home and he didn’t allow talking to her on phone also. From their neighbours we used to get the status of our sister. We secretly once in a month tried to speak to my sister; my sister says that he is looking after her just ok. But when ever our name comes he becomes angry. Please suggest us what to do and what to supplicate. Please do dua for my sister and brother in law.

Answer

In the Name of Allaah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salaamu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullaahi wa-barakaatuh.

Brother in Islaam,

We take note of the contents of your query. If the reality of the issue is as mentioned, then your brother-in-law’s attitude and behavior is unfortunate. We make du’aa that Allaah Ta’aala guides him and makes it easy for the family to deal with him.

We advise you to identify a person of influence to him and request him to intervene to restore normal relationship between you and him. Also, turn Allaah Ta’aala with du’aa. In-Shaa-Allaah, it is hoped that he will soften over time. The positive aspect of the issue is the husband is looking after your sister and is not ill-treating her. Your focus should be the happiness of your sister for now.

And Allaah Ta’aala Knows Best.

Muajul I. Chowdhury

Student, Darul Iftaa

Astoria, New York, USA

Checked and Approved by,

Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

This answer was collected from Askimam.org, which is operated under the supervision of Mufti Ebrahim Desai from South Africa.

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