Q: I am revert to this truth, this precious deen of islam for abouth 3 years. Alhamdulila I have a come a long way from the time that I first accepted Islam to now. All PRAISE TO ALLAH TA’ALA. My question is I am married for 1 year now to a woman who comes from a not vey deeni background ,but rather a family were secular education was made and is insisted to be the utmost important thing to go anywhere in this world, or rather for success and to me that is totaly the opposite as success lies in deen, Alhamdulillah I am an engineer but waalahi I will choose to have rather studied my deen any day if I embraced Islam earlier, over any profession, and hence the her knowledge of deen an education is limited. For the past year in our relations we have most of the time use reversible contraceptives such as condoms due to the fact that she is to “afraid” of falling pregnant as it will interrupt her plans in attaining her 2nd degree. However recently in many kithaabs and bayaans ive recently learnt that the correct/condoned method is rather “azl” and that we should only use reversable contraceptives when the extreme necessity arises. Now I have tried to explain this to her, but obviously she didn’t accept fully what i said, so now I am in the situation where I cant enjoy my wife without this contraceptive or if she decides not to use it, the intimate relation that we share becomes a mere in-actment whereby now we loose the enjoyment but rather focus on the moment of azl. I have never been this way but the more I learn the more I make effort to instill the teachings into my life, but i am afraid that at the cost of pleasing my wife I will be loosing yakeen in Allah Ta’ala or vice versa at my duty of pleasing Allah Ta’ala, I will be loosing my wife who I love deeply. Please advise and keep me in your duas.
A: Practising azl and the use of contraceptives, provided it is not done for wrong reasons will not be impermissible (though it is undesirable).
And Allah Ta’ala (الله تعالى) knows best.
وعن أبي سعيد الخدري قال خرجنا مع رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم غزوة بني المصطلق فأصبنا سبيا من سبي العرب فاشتهينا النساء واشتدت علينا العزبة وأحببنا العزل فأردنا أن نعزل وقلنا نعزل ورسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم بين أظهرنا قبل أن نسأله ؟ فسألناه عن ذلك فقال ما عليكم ألا تفعلوا ما من نسمة كائنة إلى يوم القيامة إلا وهي كائنة (مشكاة رقم 3186)
العزل ليس بمكروه برضا امرأته الحرة أو برضا مولى امرأته الأمة وفي الأمة المملوكة بغير رضاها (الفتاوى الهندية 1/335)
Answered by:
Mufti Zakaria Makada
Checked & Approved:
Mufti Ebrahim Salejee (Isipingo Beach)