Dear Mufti, My name is Maria.I got married almost one month ago. I am 26 years old. Alhamdulilah, I have spent my young age in a great peity. I always take hijab since the age of puberty. And I never ever imagined to go against the teachings of islam.By the grace of Allah, I found a very pious husband. I am very much satisfied with him except in sexual gratification. He discharges his sperms very early during our sexual intercourse and I remain dissatisfied. Because of shyness, I can’t tell him this. My questions is: (1) What should I do regarding this? (2) Can he put his finger inside my private parts (3) Whats are sex-toys? Can we use it? (4) Can a wife hold the penis of her husband and masturbate it? (5) Can a husband kiss and suck the breasts of his wife? (6) Can a husband lie down and the wife lets his private part go into her private part by sitting vertically (7) Is it permissible in Islam to attain any position during the intercourse provided that there is no anal sex at all? Jazaak Allahu Khayiera.
In question two and five, you enquire about acts related to your husband. How will you communicate the response to him.
Your husband has a weakness which is common among many men. It is not a disease. You cannot expect to overcome the weakness without addressing the issue with him. You married to maintain your chastity. That cannot be attained if you are not satisfied. You are young and you should guard yourself against the plots of the Shaytaan.
There is no shyness in discussing such an issue with your husband. Solutions can be sought only after agreeing on a problem. Probably, that will address the issues raised in your subsequent quesries. Nevertheless, the answers to your following queries are:
3. Sex toys ? refer below
5. Permissible. However, he should ensure that he does not take in the milk from the breast.
and Allah Ta’ala Knows Best
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Regarding the use of Sex toys, their use is permissible with the following conditions:
1. It should not cause any internal or external-harm to the body
2. It should not contain any haraam ingredients,
3. It should not be inserted into the inner-private part of the women, rather such toys should be used that stimulate the outer private parts, such as the clitoris.
4. It should only be used in foreplay and in order to enhance the act of intercourse, not to substitute it.
5. It should not be used so often that it becomes an integral part of the intercourse, so much so that the spouse then cannot gain sexual gratification without it.
6. One should also ensure that he does not commit any Haraam act when acquiring these toys nor should he go to any places of Haraam, such as adult gift shops. Even though one will be going for a valid reason, he is sure to look at Haraam pictures and others who see him enter will probably entertain evil thoughts about him.